| aching abs, bursting brains |
[Wednesday
November 18th, 2009 11:54am] |
i would have gone on with the list but im currently in the too-shag-to-think stage ): haha i must have been really bored to post this entry. like it always happens, i start blogging only when exams are nearing because i'd go crazy if i studied anymore. come t think of it, its not even studying, more like cramming. forcing things into my uhm not-very-well-developed brains :X the things i have t cram are much larger in volume that what my brain can take and this increases the pressure they exert on (the walls of?) the brains. until the point when the brains cant take the pressure anymore, they go BOOMZ. (okay not funny :( )
I DONT WANT TO STUDY ANYMORE.
I REALLY, REALLY DONT WANT TO STUDY ANYMORE. :(
HELPPPP.
somehow, i have the sudden impulse t use back my trusty ole blogspot hahaha. but that can wait till after exams. hello kinetics! YAWNN.
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[Monday
September 7th, 2009 3:57pm] |
i miss you guys. so much that its not even funny anymore. ):
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| i know in time we'll find this was no surprise. |
[Wednesday
August 5th, 2009 12:01pm] |
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mood |
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 pek chek. |
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it came out like a river once i let it out
when i thought that i wldn't know how
held onto forever just pushing it down
felt so good t let go of it now
not wrapping in ribbons
shldn't have t give a reason why
our favourite place we used t go
the warm embrace that no one knows
the loving look that's left your eyes
that why this comes as no surprise;
since this path was chosen, had my fair share of pain, finally im seeing the light again (at the very least i think i am. its progress alright). all that needed t be said has been said, all that needed t be done has been done. i've tried man so its not entirely my fault that i eventually choosing this way out. choosing seems like an overgeneralised word, more like the only thing i cld do.
im having mixed feelings about starting school. and the fact that the whole CORS thingy is so freaking screwed up that i cannot get the modules i want AT ALL thanks t weird people who zham points like nothing. 1hour t closed bidding round and the stupid thing is at 101 bidpts alrd. ARGHHH!! and this was totally a back up module of the backups that we also dint manage t get. its is so irritatinggggggg. no wonder its a vicious cycle that freshies get bullied every year. -_-
anyway flag day ytd was freaking tiring haha. been long since i did flagging and i met alot of nice ppl ytd! there was this guy who wanted t donate but he dint have any change with me so he was reallly apologetic and told me t "JIAYOU OKAY!!". and another one actually went t get a bottle of mineral water for me :D singapore has quite alot of nice people! and there was this little boy who ran up t me and said: i think you very hardworking! when i was doing night flagging (: sweet much haha. dessert at ah chew's after that with squirtle!
anyway my face has resumed its chaotah-ness. thanks t sentosa haha.
canoepolo or dragonboat? :(
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| i am still alive. |
[Friday
July 17th, 2009 12:20am] |
HAHA yes i am still alive! am back frm australia and still alive and kicking(: just passed my supposed-to-stay-at-home-and-self-quarantine-for-7days (which obviously dint succeed :/) but thank God i dint develop any flu,cough,fever,sorethroat and whatnot. :D so dont worry if you've met up with me, i'm not a health threat!
been busy with napfa testing and work at winehut ever since i've been back and life has still been pretty great so far. except for the fact that im REALLY dreading work tmr for some unknown reason. ): and afterwhich 2 weeks later will be sow'09 then school's gna start alrd! my VERY VERY VERY long holiday is coming t an end. feels kinda weird actually and im having mixed feelings about school again. blahhhh.
AND NEWS OF THE DAY: i have t extract 4 tooth for braces. hallelujah DD: haha i've got a choice of not extracting them but the results wont be as good as if i do so i guess i'd just go ahead with the tooth extracting. the freaking out can leave till a few months later when im due t pull them out. SIGH.
i need money money money. spent almost all of my assets on the trip alrd :S HAHA.
am thinking alot less now which is a good sign. go me!!
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| holiday holiday! |
[Sunday
June 28th, 2009 2:35am] |
13hours moreeeeee.
really. nothing. at. all? :(
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| this feels like shit. |
[Monday
June 22nd, 2009 12:51am] |
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mood |
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 sianned. |
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i dont mean t be some kinda stalker but facebook places news right in front of my eyes and its hard not t catch em. take care man, pray that nothing of any sort will happen and i'd be praying for you too.
ah feel like shit tdy but i dont know why. for some reason i have a feeling that it's got nothing t do with whatever stuff that has always been the cause of my uh. depression :S probably its just that feeling of growing up too fast. like time is slowly slipping away that we dont even realise it and suddenly we're like damn old already. i dont wna wake up t finding that im already like 30 or something alrd. while im able t tell it t km and its only natural that people come and go, i cant seem t take in it myself. i hate saying goodbyes. if only i cld make time stop, or maybe like turn back time. :/
maybe things will get better when school starts. more stuffs t do, less time t spare, lesser time t think of stupid things that makes me feel like shit. -_-
am gna turn in now. 12 hours, 3 weeks, 2 years. i hate time. >(
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| i can wait forever; |
[Thursday
June 18th, 2009 12:01am] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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music |
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Kris Allen - Heartless |
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i know it feels like forever
i guess thats just the price i gotta pay
but when i come back home t feel your touch makes it better
until that day theres nothing else i can do
and i just cant take it
another day without you with me
is like a blade that cuts right through me
but i can wait, i can wait forever.
when you call my heart stops beating
when you're gone it wont stop bleeding
but i can wait, i can wait forever.
i hate the silence. i really do. ): but there seems like there isnt any much there is t do. not anymore.. fullstop's been drawn, stand's been made clear, theres really nothing left, is there?
"your situation has made others feel better about theirs".
not the exact same phrase and i guess it wasnt meant t be something t be taken seriously but it kinda reflects what i knew i was stuck in but refused t face isnt it? different timing, different situation, but same kinda shit altogether. :/ seriously it struck me damn hard and it was so bad that i had t tell him t shutup and stop talking for a while cause it was kinda too overwhelming for me :/ sorry pal!
i feel damn frustrated but i dont know what t do. ): no reply no reply i bet km fell asleep alrd -_-
in other news: the news reported 2000 cases of swine flu in australia as of tdy. and im gna fly there in a week's time. lucky much? hurhur just like my bro when he was having his trip in US. wherever he was due for the next few days, a few days before that there would suddenly be reports of outbreaks of swine there but he still flew there anw. hur hur and now its my turn arghhh. no fun no fun at all. why is this happening t me?!!?! i just want a getaway from the shits of life here and have a week of fun without bothering about shit stuffs but apparently there are more shit t face over there. SIGH life is hard. ): shit i shld stop saying shit. ._. habits of the tongue are hard t change but it aint impossible. yes i remember that! afterall if it was easy it wouldnt be a habit anymore....lol.
am KINDA looking forward t sch reopening again after an ass long holiday for almost 7months alrd. but also not really looking forward t it somehow. had enough of what life has in place for me alrd, too much t take in fact. although life isnt really great or anything now, at least its routinely familiar and this makes it easier t get by. just work my ass off and keep my mind off mindless matters hurhur. OKAY maybe its another of the i-think-im-thinking-too-much nights. :/ uni's gna be great. yea it better be ><
anyway coach's wedding is gna be held in a bar! wahh hip much hahas. but now suddenly everyone's lost at what t wear alrd :/ smart casual. what is smart casual?? help!!
okay imma go read my bible! and hopefully get some sort of peace so i can sleep. full day tmr oh god.........
I know distance doesn't matter but you feel so far away;
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| bloghost dilemma. :( |
[Monday
June 8th, 2009 10:41pm] |
i have a sudden urge t switch back t blogger again because i can handle those layouts so much better. switched t using mozilla recently and my boxes are aligned left instead of center and being the very unlivejournal-savy person..i dont know how t change it leh :S see until very gaowei i dont likeeeee. ): SHLD I CHANGE BACK?? although i like the friendslock function very muchly. hahas :S
helppp.
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| its tearing holes in me again; |
[Sunday
June 7th, 2009 10:28pm] |
its a bad bad weekend. ): guess the only thing that still keeps me going is that knowing next week will (or will it?) be better. makes life easier t get by :/
so. damn. sick. of. working but i cant stop cause i know i'll need the moolahs. get pretty depressing when i have t handle my own finances. :O t think i shld have gotten used t it by now. so many places t go, so many things t see, so many stuffs t buy, but no money :O
had nothing t do and wasnt feeling in the right mood t do anything so i started reading my previous blog entries from http://soarin-awayy.blogspot.com and i reaslied i sounded so much happier last time. i wna go back back back t jc times! :( uni will be so differenttt :O
i dont wna grow up :/ haha.
ANYWAY. am going t australia in 3 week's time and im quite excited about it (minus all the swiney going on..freaking gaowei.) but that means i have t give bintan a miss. sorry jernan! my mum says : YOU BETTER DONT GO OVERSEAS ANYMORE AHH. ))): mehhhh. i rarely have the chance t go overseas leh. ):
work work work and more work. maybe i shld start reading again. makes time pass faster during down times in winehut. stoning used t be a damn good way t waste time but somehow its not applicable in winehut mannn. damn boringggg~ i still have 3 more book which i havent finished!
anyway im down with cough flu and sorethroat oh my bananas. :O and frank says: (in chinese) dont pass your ZHU LIU GAN (swine flu) to me. WEHH i dont have swine flu laaaaa. dont discriminate me ): -inserts emo face-
okay shall go play with my wheels now (haha). i want back my absssss. beats having a tummy :O
guess emoness is infectious. :/ sorrryyyy.
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| deep and meaningless; |
[Thursday
May 21st, 2009 7:16pm] |
i, i dont know why i miss you so much
yeah i, i dont know why i still feel your touch
you, you left me feeling high and dry
with nothing, nothing but the question why.
yea you, i guess you had another direction
and leaving me with nothing but a dead connection
if you call me today, i'll say that im fine
but i bet you can tell by the tone of my voice it's just a lie
you knew what you had
you still walked away leaving me in this mess
my love for you is deep and meaningless.
there are many things left t remind me
of a love that i just cant leave behind me;
my work for the week has finally ended. off day tmrr :D
anyway taiwan was great! (i shall come up with an entry about it sooooon :D) dint get t go t alishan though but still, nice scenery and good shopping but the thing that was really good was probably the break i had away from work, away from singapore. i guess that place doesnt really matter that much laaa? now now where shld i go next heh heh. monday (2nd day back in sg) was pretty bad cause i had t get use t working 12 hours all over again after breaking for a week. but tues and wed and thurs was fine and friday would be even better cause theres no work HAHAS.
had really bad cramps at work tdy till the point that i was going to die (and i still had t stay till 8.30pm cause thats when the girl for the next shift will come). but the very very nice boss wenta get pink panadol for me HAHA. and saved my life :D and i could go off early at 5.30pm! haha i feel so blessed ((: but now that im home, the pain's gone alrd. all the better hahas.
i've t decide whether or not t go melbourne by 30th mayyyy so we could get cheap tickets HEHE. but thats like one week's time and there isnt anything planned yet howwwwww. once we book it means must go alrd leh D: sucks man. if only i got my driving license alrd then melbourne would be even more fun. we all still cant drive wthhhh. must take public transport. -_-
nus fos open house on saturdayyy. i hope i can arrive at a decision after that. still super indecisive about nus/ntu. SIGHH i hate choosing schools/courses. always make me damn pek chek :@:@ and t continue canoeing or nottttt :S :S but in other news, school's finally gonna start in august. its had t understand but im REALLY missing the feeling of dragging myself t school every morning :S hahaha. cant wait cant wait!
AND lastly (i feel like an essay: in conclusion,..) i've been meeting weird people. rather, some people arnd me have started becoming pretty weird and it starting t get kinda scary :O :O maybe i've been thinking too much....but sometimes i really wonder why. damn weird damn weird! :O
gna have dinner now (AT 7.30PM FINALLY). its been long since i had dinner so early. the usual is lunch at 3pm and dinner at 10pm. my body clock is damn screwed ha ha.
anddddd on a sidenote: i really really miss talking t you! =/
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| TAIWAN! |
[Monday
May 11th, 2009 12:16am] |
am in taiwan now! for once im staying in a hotel that actually has wireless haha (: lucky much! anyway the beds here in the hotel are really big man I have a whole queen sized bed all t myself! :O i don't even sleep queen in sg hahaha.
and I have been eating non stop. -_- hahaha the tour guide says we're all gna return 7kg heavier HAHA. ana off t kenting tmr and i hope they have wireless there but I highly doubt so ): apparently it's some kinda beach resort. we're gna go cycling! :D
alrights i have t wake up 5 hours later D: goodnight!
dear Lord i pray that you'll keep our family and all those on the tour group safe and healthy despite all the swiney going on and attempting t hit taiwan. protect us from the unclean and make this a safe an enjoyable trip for everyone (: in Jesus most precious name i pray, amen.
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| im leaving on a jetplane; |
[Saturday
May 9th, 2009 12:17am] |
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countdown: 8 more hoursssss (: 
anw look at my new baby <3 HAHAHA. damn ncie man and its gold! yep, since my europe trip's gna go bust cause of the stupid swiney going arnd. (MY MUM WON'T LET ME GO :@) so i decided t spend my money on a camera instead! since i wanted t get one really long ago. time t start saving again~ hahahas.
sigh i thought i was damn firm on my decision but im starting t sway again whenever i see anything that reminds me of you. i wna talk t you so damn badly but i guess everytime i get stuck in this heart and head conflict that sums up t nothing eventually. i guess eugene was right afterall. this sucks =/
alrights gna finish up some last min packing then im off t sleep. got t get t the airport like realllly early tmr. YAWN.
crushed black and blue but you know i'd do it all again for you;
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| looking past the imperfections; |
[Tuesday
May 5th, 2009 12:31am] |
coundown: 5days t taiwan (: cant wait cant wait!
sometimes, i wonder how it'd be like if i had the chance t study overseas. like you know, totally leave everything behind and start life anew in a foreign country where no one knows me. leaving behing hurts and stuff and bringing only with me good memories that makes life easier t get by. but all these is nothing more than just a passing thought. whether i like it or not, im stuck in singapore. :O
ntu nus ntu nus i still cant decide. ):
and i hope the trip t taiwan will be a good one! despite all the swiney going on arnd. stupid swiney caused me my europe trip alrd. sighhh nvm there's still next year. hahas since twin aint gna study overseas we can still go next year right right right? (: and when i come back from taiwan, life will start anew HAHA. sounds damn cheesy -_-
dr stephan munsey came t preach in church ytd and it was really great man! he told us about getting out of scandallon (did i spell it correctly?) in other words, learning how to forgive people and got get stuck in that scandallon which was dug for us by the people whom we dont like. forget old hurts and love your enemies. just bush says: use the scandallon begone spray hahaha.
oh and my instructor just cancelled wednesday's lesson with me </3333 MR CAI HOW CAN YOU DO THIS T ME???? :( now i have no driving lesson t look forward to on wed and that ultimately makes work tmr a whole lot more dragggy. deep sigh.
12.43am now its time t sleeeeeeep. maybe if i wake up earlier tmr i'd have time t go for a run first! although my legs are still aching a bit from the jog ytd morn. dint jog v far but it was my first jog in probably 4 months time D: its time t start working out moreeeeee. i feel fat and unhealthy. double deep sigh. ):
toddles!
being happy is not about being perfect. it's about looking past the imperfections;
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| so much t love, so much t learn; |
[Wednesday
April 29th, 2009 12:43am] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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came home from work (i had t stay over time again!!!!! why do people like t come in at 9/10pm!? on a weekday somemore.) with a nice big brown envelope on my table from NUS. havent read though it though, too many pages alrd -_- NTU or NUS i still cant decide ): NUS NTU NUS NTU. at least i still have until 1st June t decide.
s l o w l y s l o w l y think. 8)
driving today was VERY VERY VERY FUN HAHA. 2nd lesson only and i was driving on the road alrd! :O drove at about 50-60km/hr HAHA. but it was damn scary and i totally dint dare t lift my eyes off the road. i like changing gears! got the very satisfied feeling ahahas. :D at first was just practising moving off at the car park and then he suddenly said "okay lets do changing of gears now and i went super alot of rounds in the carpark practising moving off and changing gears (still 20km/hr only.......) then suddenly he was like "TIME TO GO BACK NOW. you will drive us back :D" i totally HUH?!?!?! damn loud hahaha. :O :O :O :O :O!
and when everyone else arnd is driving so fast, i had t keep up with the traffic so i drove at like 50km/hr (4th gear alrd!!!! :O) haha seriously was damn fun, albeit abit scary. took about 15mins for me t drive back t bbdc from that carpark which was somewhere is cck/bukit panjang. when i ended my hand totally numb la. i think i grip the steering wheel so tightly alrd -_- HEHE CANT WAIT FOR NEXT LESSON :D
halfday work tmr and xmen at night! okay time t sleeeeeeep. i lack sleep much :O. GOODNIGHT!
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| twenty-one-one; |
[Tuesday
April 28th, 2009 12:58am] |
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am really really really tired now but just a short entry before i go t bed. realised i lost touch with blogging that i forgot how t blog! (and more evidently, i forgot how t convey my thoughts in proper words..) work has made me retarded O_o hahaha. and so i shall make it a habit t blog more frequently! okay im just talking rubbish...
ANYWAY. there is driving lesson tmr :D kinda like the only "driving" force behind my long long long day at work tdy. ha ha sorry bad pun :| we were supposed t end early tdy! but just nice at 10.45pm (15mins before the time im SUPPOSED t knock off), 4 people came into the place all ready t have a couple dishes and a few bottles of wine D: D: totally sian ttm. (HAHA i got new lingo) having customers is good! but wrong timing laaaa. so in the end i had t stay till 11.45pm before i could leave. ): and when i left they havent even left!!!! but they were nice ppl t serve cause they totally self-serviced HAHA. ordered two bottles of white at one go so i opened one first and the next time i came back t check they finished the bottle alrd so i opened the other one and placed 4 new glasses for them t change cause they were having different wines. AND the next time i came back again, the new bottle was half gone and the new glasses are untouched. :O so i went back and continued bejeweled-ing. (:
driving driving driving :DD
my eyes are feeling itchy so it means its time for me t sleep! and i cant find eye mo. ):
fake displays of strength dont seem t matter anm. cant do this;
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| i think... |
[Saturday
April 25th, 2009 3:34pm] |
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i forgot how to blog. D:
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| don't say we're not meant t be; |
[Saturday
April 25th, 2009 1:19pm] |
hello world! i survived almost 15 hours of work ytd but i came home and died till noon. :S its book out day for ten thousand army boys ytd (haha). i cant wait t see the few of them during team dinner today 8)
two long weeks, why am i still waiting?
thursday was off day! had driving lessons in the morning. first one only la, i know i slow hahaha but it was quite fun. before the lesson ended my instructor let me drive the car like one storey down the multi storey carpark :O kept looking at the sides instead of the front and he was like KAN QIAN MIAN KAN QIAN MIAN!!!
hmm then it was a movie marathon. watch 17 again and handsome suit and both were pretty brainless but very funny HAHAS. oh yes talking about 17again HAHA, the other day there was this guy who came t winhut and he kinda looked like zac efron. the nice blue eyes and all :O:O. but too bad he came t look at the menu and left for the pizzeria. HAHA.
kinda wished i was 17 again too. haa
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[Saturday
April 11th, 2009 12:12am] |
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tomorrow today. ):
the only good thing that happened tdy is i managed t get my early dismissal from work. maybe its time t sleep and everything will be fine tmr....not.
):
all the best.
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soarinaway's journal
cannot sleep.
